1st day of school

All in all, it was a good day yesterday...it was the first day of school for two of my kids and I was able to be there for most of the day. I think they enjoyed my presence and it went a long way in my recovery efforts. I want to make sure K knows that I am not going to walk away from my family that easily and that I plan on being there as much as possible...as noted in a previous post...I am not going to let myself get pushed to the background as a father and I am the only one that owns making sure that doesn't happen.

It was a good day that we all went out for pizza at the end of night, including K...which surprised me so much....when she said yes to my request, I was happy to see us being civil to each other vs her always avoiding me and not talking to me when I am around....but then my thoughts started to creep in...you see, K was acting especially upbeat during the afternoon after the kids got home from school and I started thinking that if she ended up seeing Q during the day while 2 of the 3 kids were in school and the third still isn't talking...Being married to her for 14 years, I noticed these change of behaviors in recent months and it always corresponded to hanging out with Q...

Maybe or maybe not, I really am trying not to think that way and have me obsess with something I can't control...so I did my best not to think that way at dinner and enjoyed a few slices with the kids.

All in all, a good day....and I needed one based on how I have been feeling the last few weeks. Still not out of the woods yet, not even close...but need to focus on one day at a time.