As I sit here and think, how did I ruin my life? And will it ever get better? Some days are better than others and these extended period of times of not seeing my kids until the end of the week for 2 days only really sucks. I know have to remind myself that I am on Day 83 of this recovery. I have been getting better at trying to take one day at a time and only try to change only things in your control.
I did have a recent therapy session and it wasn't that great...mainly because I entered the room in a more depressed state than normal...which felt like a huge step back in my recovery. I was reminded it was a process and see the fact that I haven't placed a bet as the real win for me. I knew this would happen as this time of year are some critical milestones in my life that I am now learning on how to get through these milestones on my own versus with my wife.
Another bummer in my life is trying to think about how do I make additional $'s to remove my dependence on Uber. I will probably always be an Uber driver as a second job but just looking to reduce the number of hours of the grind that I go through most nights during the weeknights.
I am planning on going to a GA meeting tonight so hopefully I can shake out of this mental state a bit.
Payback tracker update:
- Uber/Lyft weekly earning of $572
I did have a recent therapy session and it wasn't that great...mainly because I entered the room in a more depressed state than normal...which felt like a huge step back in my recovery. I was reminded it was a process and see the fact that I haven't placed a bet as the real win for me. I knew this would happen as this time of year are some critical milestones in my life that I am now learning on how to get through these milestones on my own versus with my wife.
Another bummer in my life is trying to think about how do I make additional $'s to remove my dependence on Uber. I will probably always be an Uber driver as a second job but just looking to reduce the number of hours of the grind that I go through most nights during the weeknights.
I am planning on going to a GA meeting tonight so hopefully I can shake out of this mental state a bit.
Payback tracker update:
- Uber/Lyft weekly earning of $572
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