I attended a GA meeting last night because my normal Thursday scheduled meeting didn't happen because of Thanksgiving. I am happy I went because the meeting helped me realize that one of my major character defects is being very impatient. I feel that I am impatient in so many ways and it causes nothing but problems for me down the road.
Here are some ways I am impatient, not in any priority order:
1. My current financial payback plan. I currently was able to setup a plan to payback some of my major debts within a year time frame, which is pretty good given the amount of debt I owe. And don't get me wrong it will take me a good 5 years to get rid of all the debt I created. I have been able to stay on track with this plan for the last 3 months, which is a positive sign....but I find myself always thinking and prioritizing making money over everything else, like working on myself and recovery. I often find myself saying I can make so much more driving Uber if I don't attend this GA meeting. I also find myself pushing to the limits of driving sometimes to get that last fare in.
2. Relationship status with K. I also realize that over the last 3 months, I find myself pushing K to make a decision with what is going to happen between us (separated, divorced, going to couples counseling, etc...) I am not giving her the time she needs to process all that we have been through and find that I am just adding more stress into an already stressful situation. I need to remind myself that I can't control her decisions and she will need to get to that place at her own speed.
3. With my kids. There are times in the past I might have been short with my kids because of how they were getting through the day. I know they are still learning and that many parents can say this, but I want to practice taking a breath and enjoying the moments I have with them...as in lately I only really get to hang out with them for 1-2 days on the weekend.
All of these actions cause me to reflect that I need to start learning to be patience and enjoy the today for what it is...I know it doesn't happen overnight, but one day at a time.
Payback tracker update:
Weekly Uber/Lyft earnings: $557
Here are some ways I am impatient, not in any priority order:
1. My current financial payback plan. I currently was able to setup a plan to payback some of my major debts within a year time frame, which is pretty good given the amount of debt I owe. And don't get me wrong it will take me a good 5 years to get rid of all the debt I created. I have been able to stay on track with this plan for the last 3 months, which is a positive sign....but I find myself always thinking and prioritizing making money over everything else, like working on myself and recovery. I often find myself saying I can make so much more driving Uber if I don't attend this GA meeting. I also find myself pushing to the limits of driving sometimes to get that last fare in.
2. Relationship status with K. I also realize that over the last 3 months, I find myself pushing K to make a decision with what is going to happen between us (separated, divorced, going to couples counseling, etc...) I am not giving her the time she needs to process all that we have been through and find that I am just adding more stress into an already stressful situation. I need to remind myself that I can't control her decisions and she will need to get to that place at her own speed.
3. With my kids. There are times in the past I might have been short with my kids because of how they were getting through the day. I know they are still learning and that many parents can say this, but I want to practice taking a breath and enjoying the moments I have with them...as in lately I only really get to hang out with them for 1-2 days on the weekend.
All of these actions cause me to reflect that I need to start learning to be patience and enjoy the today for what it is...I know it doesn't happen overnight, but one day at a time.
Payback tracker update:
Weekly Uber/Lyft earnings: $557
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